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Timeshare Faith

 

Is your “Timeshare” version of Faith pushing your teen away? Recently I took my oldest son to talk to both an Army and an Air Force recruiter.  It is important that you know that from the time of Jake’s earliest declarations of what he would be when he grew up, he knew that he would serve in our military.  It is how God has wired him.  We have known for years that the day of talking to recruiters was inevitable.  However, throughout the years, time and time again Jake has been encouraged by family, friends, and acquaintances to join the Air Force.  This was communicated to him for reasons such as quality of life and to match his short and long-term goals, among others.  However, the only reason that he agreed to sit down with an Air Force recruiter is because I made both appointments within the same recruiting office.  Jake was sure that the Air Force would be the easy way of serving in the military, and this is not what he desired.

The day was hot and the air-conditioning in the building was broken, as we sat and waited for the Air Force recruiter to arrive.  He was obviously very busy.  We later found out that he was the only recruiter in the area.  In contrast, the Army office was about four times larger than the Air Force office and housed eight recruiters to the Air Force’s one.  When the time for our meeting with the Army recruiter arrived, we were escorted to the recruiter’s desk where he pulled out a three ring binder filled with examples and pictures, pay stubs, and insurance information and everything else that they could show a new recruit to entice them into a life of service. We listened for about an hour as they painted a very nice picture about what life would be like in the Army.  Every tactic to appeal to a young man’s sense of amusement and adventure was used.  As we left the building, I told my son that I felt like they were selling him a timeshare. He shared only the good and none of the hardship that awaits a person who dedicates his life to serving our country.

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Next, we met with the Air Force recruiter.  The office was crowded with only three of us in the room.  Posters on the wall displayed a picture of Air Force life, but the words from the mouth of the recruiter were much different than the words we had just heard across the hall.  He told us from the beginning that he could focus on all the positive points of the job, but instead he told us that it was more important that he represented the Air Force accurately.  His goal was not to recruit Jake to an easy life, but instead invited him to be a part of something bigger than that.  He shared some of the inevitable hardships of service and the intense training that Jake needed to undergo before the Air Force would even consider him for a position.  He asked Jake a bunch of questions to evaluate his character and values and warned him that during his final year of high school, he needed to continue to make wise choices.  He shared stories of young men who trained for the job and allowed their character to wane, ultimately costing them their position in the Air Force.  The list of physical requirements was not for the weak of heart. As a mother, the moment my heart grew faint was when the recruiter explained to Jake that if he was serious about being a PJ in the Air Force, he would need to allow others to hold him underwater until he passed out and drowned.  He clarified that this would happen many times during training and that Jake must be willing to put his life into the hands of others.  At that moment, I wanted to look into Jake’s eyes and see some sensible, rational understanding; I wanted him to realize that this was just too dangerous… Instead, as I looked into the eyes of my son, I saw more resolve than I had ever seen.  As the recruiter diverted his attention away from us to find something, Jake mouthed to me, “This is exactly what I wanted!”  He was more enticed than he had ever been.

We started the day confident that the end choice would be the Army and ended the day with a completely different decision.  Jake had heard from two salesmen.  One told of the “good life” and one told of the “hard reality” for a great cause.  Jake chose the harder of the two. Why? Because he wanted to give his life to something that was real.

Teens today long for something real in the midst of an often self-serving and impersonal world. They are cause-driven! Teens want to identify with causes that require them to work toward something bigger than themselves. This is true especially in the area of following Jesus.

Unfortunately, as parents, many of us have offered a soft, easy version of Christianity to our children. We have taught them the stories of the Bible. We have told them about the love of God, the grace of God, the forgiveness of God, and eternity with God.  It sounds beautiful!  And it is, but it is only half of the story.  The love of God is balanced by His justice, and His grace can be rejected.  Eternity in paradise is only given to those who completely give their lives to Jesus as Savior and Lord.  It is easy to accept the Savior, but the “Lord” part of Christianity is often misunderstood. Please don’t misunderstand.  I am not in any way saying that our salvation is based on our works, but if Jesus is our Lord, then we will see changes in our life patterns and behaviors.  Like Jake’s training for the Air Force, we must train for the position of disciple. We must trust our lives in the hands of another (Jesus). We must be willing to be set apart for the position (to be made holy).

Because many of us, as parents, have only given a portion of what God requires from our faith, many of our kids are turning away from faith altogether. Barna, in his book Transforming Children into Spiritual Champions, cited that over 80% of teens raised in Christian homes walk away from the church when they go off to college. Why are our kids turning to other things to fill the hole in their lives? I suggest it is because we are offering a “Timeshare Version of Faith.” We offer to our kids all of the “good” things that come from believing in God without expecting true life change. The faith that we are raising our children with is often a faith that is lukewarm – a safe faith, producing “good” people. The problem is God never said that our faith should be easy.  In fact, as Christians, the Bible promises that we will have trouble and hard times in this world.  In John 16:33, Jesus said, “… Here on earth you will have many trials and sorrows. But take heart, because I have overcome theworld.”

God never said our faith should be easy. @IfThenMovement #faith #Christianity #ParentingTeens

ChooseNow WendyFitzgerald 220x234px ButtonB Timeshare FaithAre we preparing our children to be able to stand strong when the hard times come?  Are we offering them a faith worth fighting for? Do they know that in Jesus they are part of something greater than themselves? What would happen if we coached our kids to look for ways to stand for their faith, share their faith, live their faith and assist others in their faith? Could the tides turn? Could our kids engage their generation with a faith that is stronger than our generation’s faith? The battle is real. Are you equipped for the fight?

 

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